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Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread :-D
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Canuck
·What do you get when you cross sheep and kangaroos................ Wooly jumpers.
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haqq777
·
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VjaceCZ
·
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Darlinboy
··Pratts! Will I B******S!!!Q: How does Moses make his morning coffee?
A. He brews it!
A. He brews it!
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Darlinboy
··Pratts! Will I B******S!!!With fewer people on the road due to pandemic restrictions, traffic accidents are way way down... and so are personal injury claims. Some firms are getting rather desperate. I saw a billboard yesterday that read:
Have Covid-19 mandates caused you to have to wear a mask and eyeglasses at the same time?
Call us now! You may be entitled to condensation.
Have Covid-19 mandates caused you to have to wear a mask and eyeglasses at the same time?
Call us now! You may be entitled to condensation.
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Archer
··Omega Qualified Watchmaker
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Mad Dog
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M'Bob
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Omegafanman
·One for the Children tonight…..
Christmas Eve and Santa was getting ready to fly with all the presents for the good girls and boys… when a little officious man with round glasses, a business suit and an inadequate coat knocked on the Grotto door. I am from the international civil aviation authority he explained, and you do not have appropriate license .. so you are banned from flying tonight. Desperate to bring happiness and wonder to the world Santa used all his elves to immediately fill out every bureaucratic form and applied for an instant licence by magic. Not so fast said the man – you still have to pass an airworthiness test. For several hours the man then checked and tested every element of the reindeers and sleigh, pulling on the harness of prancer and dancer, checking the hooves of donner and blitzen and measuring the lumen output from Rudolph’s nose. Every test was passed and so he agreed to a flight test…. Santa climbed aboard lifted the reigns and the sleigh shot forward, lifting magically and majestically into the night sky behind the team of reindeer. The inspector suddenly pulled a .45 Webley revolver from under his jacket took aim and short Rudolph dead, clean through the head. Horrified Santa brought the sleigh to land … why he screamed why…… What is your problem said the man – just a standard engine failure recovery test …..
Christmas Eve and Santa was getting ready to fly with all the presents for the good girls and boys… when a little officious man with round glasses, a business suit and an inadequate coat knocked on the Grotto door. I am from the international civil aviation authority he explained, and you do not have appropriate license .. so you are banned from flying tonight. Desperate to bring happiness and wonder to the world Santa used all his elves to immediately fill out every bureaucratic form and applied for an instant licence by magic. Not so fast said the man – you still have to pass an airworthiness test. For several hours the man then checked and tested every element of the reindeers and sleigh, pulling on the harness of prancer and dancer, checking the hooves of donner and blitzen and measuring the lumen output from Rudolph’s nose. Every test was passed and so he agreed to a flight test…. Santa climbed aboard lifted the reigns and the sleigh shot forward, lifting magically and majestically into the night sky behind the team of reindeer. The inspector suddenly pulled a .45 Webley revolver from under his jacket took aim and short Rudolph dead, clean through the head. Horrified Santa brought the sleigh to land … why he screamed why…… What is your problem said the man – just a standard engine failure recovery test …..
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Archer
··Omega Qualified Watchmaker
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RonJ
·An oldie but a goodie.
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Omegafanman
·Its Xmas - so time for your worst Cracker jokes …..(Santa arrived early last weekend :0)…
It is still a cracker / it's they way they tell em…...
