- Posts
- 2,674
- Likes
- 7,472
Do the civil inadvertently enable the uncivil?
- Posts
- 2,327
- Likes
- 2,542
Professor
·Internet trolls and just plain socially inept people are more often empowered by those they attack fighting back in kind.
They seek confrontation not agreement.
They thrive on the attention and effort put into answering their insulting behavior.
Best to just mute their comments when possible.
They seek confrontation not agreement.
They thrive on the attention and effort put into answering their insulting behavior.
Best to just mute their comments when possible.
- Posts
- 4,123
- Likes
- 11,770
Waltesefalcon
·You should have an immediate response to behavior like this but maintain your own civility while doing it. Simply point out their lack of manners and move on. Ruminating on it only gives this person a power over you that they should not have. I guarantee that the rude employee is not spending her time thinking about you right now so you shouldn't be thinking about her.
- Posts
- 2,048
- Likes
- 5,537
Mouse_at_Large
·I fear that it's due to an increasing number of kids who have grown up never hearing the word "no".
- Posts
- 16,305
- Likes
- 45,005
JwRosenthal
·I fear that it's due to an increasing number of kids who have grown up never hearing the word "no".
I played baseball in high school- I spent plenty of time on the bench....I wasn't a starter....I didn't cry, it's life.
And I'm not that old -what the fυck happened???
- Posts
- 10,907
- Likes
- 54,006
Walrus
·I must admit I’m a trump fan and often wear a trump shirt and or hat. Believe it or not I get more positive reactions than negative. Most of the other trump fans say something akin to, you are brave for wearing that I like trump just don’t want the hassle. I’ve only gotten about three negative comments but one drunk guy who actually wanted to fight. My response is usually are you such a snowflake a hat triggers you. I’ve never had anyone continue after that. Besides that I don’t really care if someone isn’t treating in a decent manner. I also don’t use my horn anymore when driving, I used to have an issue with road rage
- Posts
- 5,528
- Likes
- 9,451
BlackTalon
··This Space for RentThere is ZERO respect for people in authority now. ZERO NADA ZILCH NONE.
- Posts
- 7,223
- Likes
- 23,437
M'Bob
·Everyone gets a prize, everyone is special, your feelings are the most important.....blech 🤮
I played baseball in high school- I spent plenty of time on the bench....I wasn't a starter....I didn't cry, it's life.
And I'm not that old -what the fυck happened???
Here's my take: the cell phone equipped with camera, unearthed a pervasive, untapped narcissistic streak that has been brewing below the surface of humanity. Thus, everyone is now special, everyone a celebrity.
- Posts
- 7,223
- Likes
- 23,437
- Posts
- 16,305
- Likes
- 45,005
JwRosenthal
·Here's my take: the cell phone equipped with camera, unearthed a pervasive, untapped narcissistic streak that has been brewing below the surface of humanity. Thus, everyone is now special, everyone a celebrity.
In my youth, being part of a community (club, team, group) was something we all wanted- we have gone the other direction now.
- Posts
- 24,613
- Likes
- 54,657
- Posts
- 10,907
- Likes
- 54,006
Walrus
·Interesting. I have never been passionate enough about any political candidate or politician to advertise them on a hat, shirt, or car.
- Posts
- 7,223
- Likes
- 23,437
- Posts
- 2,814
- Likes
- 14,886
The Father
·You want to try shopping in the UK mate! We've got the worst customer service anywhere. 😲
The basteddz just say "Right....I've got ya money... now take ya stuff... and 'fakk awff out of my shop!"😁
UK is rainy and cold, don’t you expect the basteddz to be fakken nasty rude? Forgot, and the shitty food.
Edited:
- Posts
- 1,432
- Likes
- 1,580
shaun hk
·We have one particularly bad client who has in the past made my colleague both shout and cry in the office. Previously he refused to deal with me as he knows I will not take crap from him and would shut him down if he tries to bully me. I’ve tried to teach my colleague how to be polite but firm but I think it just comes with age and experience. It also helps being a white guy in Hong Kong, he can demand the ridiculous of a younger Chinese girl but treats an older male differently.
With the lady in the store I think it just depends on how much you care, if you care about her on a human level go with the concern, ask after her wellbeing, tell her you’ve noticed she can sometimes be short with people. You might find she’ll be nice to you but still crap with everyone else.
As I age I’ve come to realise all I have in life are my interactions and relationships with other people. That is it, everything else, my watches, my job, my iPad, all of that is just fluff. Sadly I am not going to change the world, all I can do is to be kind and decent to those I come in contact with. And I consistently fυck up, get cranky with people on the metro and my family but all I can do is try to do better next time and apologies when it is due.
With the lady in the store I think it just depends on how much you care, if you care about her on a human level go with the concern, ask after her wellbeing, tell her you’ve noticed she can sometimes be short with people. You might find she’ll be nice to you but still crap with everyone else.
As I age I’ve come to realise all I have in life are my interactions and relationships with other people. That is it, everything else, my watches, my job, my iPad, all of that is just fluff. Sadly I am not going to change the world, all I can do is to be kind and decent to those I come in contact with. And I consistently fυck up, get cranky with people on the metro and my family but all I can do is try to do better next time and apologies when it is due.
- Posts
- 222
- Likes
- 960
D YOUNG
·There are numerous examples of this I've seen, at the post office, in the gym, at the movie theater, etc., but this one happened today at Whole Foods. I often go there at lunch time, to pick up a few odds and ends at the deli counter.
The staff there is invariably friendly and cordial, except for one woman who's consistently brusque, unprofessional and condescending to customers - I've seen this multiple times.
Well today, she pulled that shit with me, and I took the high-road, and let it slide. Maybe she's unhappy at home, in her job...or maybe there's something else I'm not aware of. I noted this to a co-worker of her's off to the side, and was told, as I already knew, that she does this all the time, and I should complain to management.
But she's been there for years, pulling the same crap on a daily basis, and most likely the high-minded staff and customers have never really complained.
As I started to ruminate on this, it became apparent that maybe we are all enabling this behavior, by not calling it out. And I think it's a bogus move to go over her head, so next time in, if she does it again, I'm going to enlighten her, gently if I can, or with more edge if I can't, about how her behavior is unacceptable.
Have you seen similar scenarios, and how do you handle them?
I have a policy that don't annoy or argue with people that touch my food. 😀
- Posts
- 10,907
- Likes
- 54,006
Walrus
·It’s always easy to say I don’t let people with shitty attitudes effect me but we are social creatures and like meeting someone uplifting or someone that teaches you something can be uplifting the nasty ones can drag you down. Then you spread that negativity albeit unconsciously. So if you are in an international airport and piss a few people off, they get on planes to different parts of the world, you can actually bring a touch of unhappiness to a handful of people all over the world. Give it a try someday
- Posts
- 1,787
- Likes
- 2,000
michael22
·It’s always easy to say I don’t let people with shitty attitudes effect me but we are social creatures and like meeting someone uplifting or someone that teaches you something can be uplifting the nasty ones can drag you down. Then you spread that negativity albeit unconsciously. So if you are in an international airport and piss a few people off, they get on planes to different parts of the world, you can actually bring a touch of unhappiness to a handful of people all over the world. Give it a try someday
- Posts
- 1,161
- Likes
- 6,812
timjohn
·The OP seems to be basically asking whether civil people should toterate incivility. Karl Popper says no
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradox_of_tolerance
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradox_of_tolerance
- Posts
- 10,907
- Likes
- 54,006
Similar threads
- Posts
- 34
- Views
- 656
- Posts
- 1
- Views
- 625
- Posts
- 6
- Views
- 898
- Posts
- 2
- Views
- 171
- Posts
- 4
- Views
- 459
