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Breakup advice...
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wagudc
·
Five years is a long time , but she was not the right one. Better to let her go now than to waste more time with her. I am not sure what you think of Country music but the Garth Brooks song "Unanswered Prayers" fits well here. The story in the song matches my life in a way. He is thanking God that his past prayers were not answered about wanting to be with a particular woman, because it didn't work out with her he was able to meet his true love and present day wife. Sounds a bit cheesy (because it is), but there is real truth there. Who knows what the future holds, but I am guessing that you will come out better off in the end.
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JwRosenthal
·.
Five years is a long time , but she was not the right one. Better to let her go now than to waste more time with her. I am not sure what you think of Country music but the Garth Brooks song "Unanswered Prayers" fits well here. The story in the song matches my life in a way. He is thanking God that his past prayers were not answered about wanting to be with a particular woman, because it didn't work out with her he was able to meet his true love and present day wife. Sounds a bit cheesy (because it is), but there is real truth there. Who knows what the future holds, but I am guessing that you will come out better off in the end.
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jsducote
·Another member of the club here. Dated for 8 years, then married for 4. She fell for a coworker, then tried to convince herself that it was my fault for not being as "passionate" as he was. That was 16 years ago. 9 times out of 10 when my phone rings, it's someone claiming to be a real estate investor wanting to buy her house. I tell them to come on over with the paperwork and to bring cash.
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Canuck
·Or Glenn Yarbrough about falling out of love, then falling in love again. “Never Let Her Go”.
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Rumar89
·Same thing happened to me in January, 8+ year relationship. Nobody did anything wrong, she just said she didn’t know if she could do it anymore. Mind you, this was 7 months after we bought a house. I struggled with it for the first month. Took up yoga because it gave me a sense of calm, went vegetarian, started watching my diet, and got back into hiking. Now in June I’ve lost 45lbs; back to the weight I was in college. I feel better than I have in years. Had a buddy move in to cover half the mortgage, and it’s probably been good to have somebody around.
Focus on you. Control the things you have control over and forget the rest. Do the things you’ve wanted to that life got in the way and prevented. It’s gets better.
Focus on you. Control the things you have control over and forget the rest. Do the things you’ve wanted to that life got in the way and prevented. It’s gets better.
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Professor
·An old flame I hadn't seen in more than thirty years showed up at my front door with out even calling ahead not long ago.
I half expected to see a thirty something offspring waiting in her car.
It was a bit less awkward than it might have been. Through much younger than I and remarkably well preserved for her age I found I felt no attraction to her at all. I was glad to see her on her way and when she called a week later I quickly tired of her small talk. I found I had to tell her I had something important I had to attend to, which was true enough. No further contact since and no mixed feelings about that on my part.
Its much tougher to run across the older women who were so important to my introduction to the finer things when I was a teenager. They were in full bloom and sexy as Betty Page back then but now those that are still alive are on walkers and lugging oxygen tanks around.
I half expected to see a thirty something offspring waiting in her car.
It was a bit less awkward than it might have been. Through much younger than I and remarkably well preserved for her age I found I felt no attraction to her at all. I was glad to see her on her way and when she called a week later I quickly tired of her small talk. I found I had to tell her I had something important I had to attend to, which was true enough. No further contact since and no mixed feelings about that on my part.
Its much tougher to run across the older women who were so important to my introduction to the finer things when I was a teenager. They were in full bloom and sexy as Betty Page back then but now those that are still alive are on walkers and lugging oxygen tanks around.
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oinkitt
·OMFG!!!!!
I thought this was a watch forum!!!
I thought this was a watch forum!!!
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krogerfoot
·When my marriage ended, a friend advised me to do exactly what you're doing—tell people you're going through a hard time and ask for help. I wish I had—you're getting some good advice here.
At that time, someone else told me "second marriages are better," which turned out to be 100% true and a really wise observation. When a serious relationship founders, it's a hard lesson, but then again, one you learn; it teaches you. The fact that you're willing to ask for help is a hopeful sign.
One hard lesson for me was that some of my closest friends disappeared instantly, as if they thought divorce were contagious. They revealed themselves very clearly, but at the same time, other people I never thought had any especial affection for me offered more kindness and hospitality and goodness than I ever imagined existed. Things get better. You have a lot to look forward to.
At that time, someone else told me "second marriages are better," which turned out to be 100% true and a really wise observation. When a serious relationship founders, it's a hard lesson, but then again, one you learn; it teaches you. The fact that you're willing to ask for help is a hopeful sign.
One hard lesson for me was that some of my closest friends disappeared instantly, as if they thought divorce were contagious. They revealed themselves very clearly, but at the same time, other people I never thought had any especial affection for me offered more kindness and hospitality and goodness than I ever imagined existed. Things get better. You have a lot to look forward to.
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M'Bob
·The problem with many relationship break-ups is that often, one or more of the participants are not in touch with why things are not working. Obviously, the problem with that is that unless it gets sorted out, the issues will likely crop up again.
A good friend of mine who was married with two boys, had one of those enviable unions to the extent that when other couples were around them, their loving, respectful, nurturing relationship got on everyone else’s nerves. Invariably, after spending time with them, my wife would be sullen in the car ride home, and when prompted, would say, “Why the hell don’t you treat me the way Phil treats Amy?”
I hadn’t spoken to Phil in a number of years, as that can happen, and I asked how Amy was. He said, “She decided one day she didn’t want to be married anymore, so she packed her bags, and moved across the country.” Shocked was an understatement.
Unfortunately, we often don’t know what’s really going on in someone else’s head, and often, our own. Not a great paradigm for success.
A good friend of mine who was married with two boys, had one of those enviable unions to the extent that when other couples were around them, their loving, respectful, nurturing relationship got on everyone else’s nerves. Invariably, after spending time with them, my wife would be sullen in the car ride home, and when prompted, would say, “Why the hell don’t you treat me the way Phil treats Amy?”
I hadn’t spoken to Phil in a number of years, as that can happen, and I asked how Amy was. He said, “She decided one day she didn’t want to be married anymore, so she packed her bags, and moved across the country.” Shocked was an understatement.
Unfortunately, we often don’t know what’s really going on in someone else’s head, and often, our own. Not a great paradigm for success.
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JwRosenthal
·The problem with many relationship break-ups is that often, one or more of the participants are not in touch with why things are not working. Obviously, the problem with that is that unless it gets sorted out, the issues will likely crop up again.
A good friend of mine who was married with two boys, had one of those enviable unions to the extent that when other couples were around them, their loving, respectful, nurturing relationship got on everyone else’s nerves. Invariably, after spending time with them, my wife would be sullen in the car ride home, and when prompted, would say, “Why the hell don’t you treat me the way Phil treats Amy?”
I hadn’t spoken to Phil in a number of years, as that can happen, and I asked how Amy was. He said, “She decided one day she didn’t want to be married anymore, so she packed her bags, and moved across the country.” Shocked was an understatement.
Unfortunately, we often don’t know what’s really going on in someone else’s head, and often, our own. Not a great paradigm for success.
My ex had been thinking for years about what she wanted and where her life was going, but she either didn’t communicate it in a way I could understand or I wasn’t listening. The worst thing you can do is live unhappily and quietly hope things will get better- or being obtuse when one person is hinting at their discontent and the other tries to placate and make it go away. It’s a waste of both party’s time and energies. Always listen, always live honestly, always communicate- even if it’s uncomfortable.
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FREDMAYCOIN
·Whatever happens in my life never will going down this route.
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Theluglife
·sorry to hear that. Be assured that things will get better. It wont seem like it will for a long time but one day, you're going to look back on this from a much better place.
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YY77
·Don’t knock it till you try it.
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