❅ Types of Watch Guys & Gals ❅

ConElPueblo

The Hodinkist.

Is a kaukasian male, typically Northern American between the age of 21 to 40 (there are outliers). Slightly overweight, pale and bearded. Wears his shirt buttoned up, but rarely wear a necktie. Loves bowties, but feel that they make people take him less seriously. Has a job that requires him to stare at a computer screen for at least 8 hours a day, most likely in advertising/communication. This has made him prone to believing pretty much all bullshit he reads, with the consequence that he is convinced that the founder* of Hodinkee.com is Messiah reborn and the rest of the site's editorial staff** are his disciples. The result is a number of grovelling attempts at getting the attention of The Chosen One including, praising the mediocre writing on the reviews, wearing garish wristbands like his heroes and gaining weight in order to achieve the same pudgy look. Is very fond of repeating what he has read on his favourite watch website, including the correct pronouncation of "Glashütte", "A. Lange & Söhne" and "Jaeger LeCoultre*** as well as how cool one-pusher chronographs are. Talks a lot about "craftmanship", "soul of the machine" and about being "authentic".

Dream watches: issued Rolex Submariner (because military)****, Heuer Whatevergraph-Rallyface (because Steve McQueen), Patek Philippe something-or-other (because "Cala-traaava").



*Still can't believe he calls himself "founder" of something, like it's some colony on the outskirts of civilisation or a charity foundation.
**The nerve! THE NERVE!!!!
***Failing miserably in the attempt.
***The Hodinkist will rarely, if ever, leave his room for fear of triggering his numerous allergies/his social phobies, and a military career would be as realistic as him striking up an interesting conversation with Scarlett Johanson.

oddboy

The Prolific Speedmaster Hoarder

buys every speedmaster he can get his hands on.

'oh look! a speedmaster! I'm so surprised'

jimmyd13

I like it when someone resurrects a thread that predates my involvement with the site, particularly when it makes me laugh. I can associate with almost every stereotype listed ... except the Hodinkist. I seem to have a somewhat irrational dislike of the Hodinks.

So, let me add one more type (a me) ...

Sees a Broken Watch that Must Be "Saved" ...
This is the collector who rarely buys new, instead being convinced that everything older is better. Is perversely annoyed by retro-styled new watches while at the same time wishing that everything new was smaller, thinner and more like watches used to be. Every watch he buys needs something repairing. Often having more than one issue. Usually they've been drown. Always, they cost more to repair than they did to buy and will never recoup the investment in them, even though he tells his other half that they're worth a small fortune. The result is something like 12 new watches going into the collection each year while more than 50 are passed on to new owners. He still never makes a profit as each sale releases funds for a new project.

Seaborg

The guy who fears his wife's reaction
and has to hide her he bought a new Pre-moon Speedy instead of paying taxes...
- wife: "What is this watch??? I've never seen it before!!"
- guy : "Sweet heart, I bought it a while ago (last week actually) and I have found it back in the drawer of my desk" (the guy is actually sweating a lot because of the stress 😵‍💫)
- wife: "Hum... I was afraid you bought AGAIN a new watch..."
- guy (feeling guilty 😬): "No sweety, I already have a pre-moon Speedy, I do not need another" (hopefully, speedies look all the same for newbies 😗)

gostang9

Bump for a great thread...

noelekal

The Home For Wayward Watches

Benevolently takes in all and sundry watch finds that are a bit past it, giving them a "retirement home." Will never catch up on having them all serviced. Could have bought a neato strap for the same price is typically paid for these watch waifs. The serviced ones do get the occasional day out of the retirement home.