Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread [No politics/religion]

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If anyone is contemplating that special offer for circumcision on the bay, don`t take it. It is a rip-off.
 
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An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.
After all. Isn’t today the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. And now you know why.
 
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Live to words by:

I’m sure we could start a whole new thread on dodgy tattoos 😉

It appears Harry Potter is the fifth Beatle…

 
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I’m sure we could start a whole new thread on dodgy tattoos 😉

It appears Harry Potter is the fifth Beatle…


and cousin of Sloth based on the eye placement...

 
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After all. Isn’t today the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. And now you know why.

I take a leaf from the great sage Homer Simpson….

When I am getting up to some stupid sh-t with consequences, I just say to myself, well that will be a a problem for for future me to deal with…..and Man I don't envy that guy ;0)
 
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"Man has always assumed that he is more intelligent than dolphins because he has achieved so much--the wheel, New York, wars and so on -- while all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But, conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man -- for precisely the same reasons." Douglas Adams
 
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"Man has always assumed that he is more intelligent than dolphins because he has achieved so much--the wheel, New York, wars and so on -- while all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But, conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man -- for precisely the same reasons." Douglas Adams
Hitchhikers FTW !!! I’ve read all 4 of the “trilogy”, several times 😲😜