Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread [No politics/religion]

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Farm-raising, when space is limited..

I'm guessing not sushi-grade...
 
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We decided to have a fish supper. I went to the fish and chip shop and asked for haddock and chips twice. The assistant said I heard you the first time.

The closest I can come to this being remotely funny is that, apparently, in some parts of the UK you would say "fish and chips twice" versus "two orders of fish and chips". So, the "joke" is that the customer and the server are from different regions. Is that correct?
 
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The closest I can come to this being remotely funny is that, apparently, in some parts of the UK you would say "fish and chips twice" versus "two orders of fish and chips". So, the "joke" is that the customer and the server are from different regions. Is that correct?

You seem a tad mardy and at risk of starting a ruction ;0)
 
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The closest I can come to this being remotely funny is that, apparently, in some parts of the UK you would say "fish and chips twice" versus "two orders of fish and chips". So, the "joke" is that the customer and the server are from different regions. Is that correct?

Not really.

Irrespective of one’s geographical location or style of spoken grammar, most people in the UK will appreciate the ‘joke’. If not for the humour, then at least for the ironical play on words.
 
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NASA (Newcastle Aeronautics and Space Administration) - Representing the 'Toon from Morpeth to the Moon

 
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The closest I can come to this being remotely funny is that, apparently, in some parts of the UK you would say "fish and chips twice" versus "two orders of fish and chips". So, the "joke" is that the customer and the server are from different regions. Is that correct?
Eh, calm down!
 
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The closest I can come to this being remotely funny is that, apparently, in some parts of the UK you would say "fish and chips twice" versus "two orders of fish and chips". So, the "joke" is that the customer and the server are from different regions. Is that correct?

Maybe
 
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Why it’s important to avoid alcohol during the work week:

 
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Not really.

Irrespective of one’s geographical location or style of spoken grammar, most people in the UK will appreciate the ‘joke’. If not for the humour, then at least for the ironical play on words.

Fair enough. I suppose it would have been better to ask for the joke to be explained. Not upset, just confused. I made the assumption that I was missing something that made the joke funny, rather, funnier as there were people who liked it.

Sorry. Carry on.
Edited:
 
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Why?! Why?!


Referring of course to Tanya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan, the figure skaters that had a very public dust-up, many years ago. Did Harding do jail time for assault? I don’t remember.
 
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Referring of course to Tanya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan, the figure skaters that had a very public dust-up, many years ago. Did Harding do jail time for assault? I don’t remember.

"Why? Why?" was what Nancy Kerrigan screamed after she was struck on the knee.