Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread :-D

I don't know what's going on at the Minister Creek Campground, but it can't be good....

A young, beautiful lady was sent on a cruise for holiday by her husband. He could not join because of pressure of work. He promised to join her later and catch up with her.

She made a point of writing diary daily.

Day 1
Just found my room. Facing ocean with spectacular view. Evening met many people. There are 1500 people on cruise with crew.

Day 2
Today just chilled on pool side. Met Captain of cruise. Nice Handsome guy.

Day 3
Went to Casino. By luck won
$500. Was overjoyed. Captain happened to be there and offered me Dinner. It was nice. Hecis very attractive and attentive.He gave also expensive champagne. Asked me to join him in his cabin for night. I politely declined. Said I am married. And I love my husband.

Day 4
Just chilled today. Walked around cruise. Show some nice movie in theatre. Bumped in to Captain again. He asked me to join him for dinner again. But I managed to say No.

Day 5
Pool again today. Got sunburned, and I
went inside to drink at piano-bar, stayed there for rest of day. Captain saw me, bought me several large drinks. Really is charming
Again asked me to visit his cabin for the night. Again I declined. He told me, if I did not let him have his way with me, he would sink the ship... I was shocked..

Day 6
Today I saved 1500 lives. Twice!

Bird watching season..;
.

Headache & Testicles:

A man had suffered from really bad headaches for the last 20 years. He eventually decides to go and see a Doctor in a Multi speciality hospital.

The Doctor says, the good news he can cure his headaches. The bad news is that they will require removing his testicles.

The doctor said that "You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press on your spine and the pressure creates one hell of a headache.The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles."

The man was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for.

He had no choice but to go under the knife. The surgery costed him Rs 4,00,000/-.

When he left the hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself.

As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life.

He saw a Men's clothing store and thought, 'That's what I need. A new Suit.'

He entered the shop and told the salesman, 'I'd like a new Suit.'

The elderly Tailor eyed him briefly and said, 'Let's see size 44 would fit fine.

The man laughed, 'That's right, how did you know?'

'Been in the business 60 years sir!' the tailor said.

The man tried on the suit it fitted perfectly. As he admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, 'How about a new shirt?'

The man thought for a moment and then said, 'Sure.'

The salesman eyed him and said, 'Let's see, 34 sleeves and 16-1/2 neck.'

The man was surprised, 'That's right, how did you know?'

'Been in the business 60 years sir.'

The man tried the shirt and it fitted perfectly.

The man walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, 'How about some new Underwear?'

The man thought for a moment and said, 'Sure..'

The salesman said, 'Let's see..... size 36.

The man laughed, 'Ah ha! You got it wrong this time! I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old..'

The salesman shook his head, 'You can't wear a size 34 sir. *_A size 34 would press your Testicles up against the base of your spine and give you hell of a Headache._*'

_Surgery - Rs 4,00,000/- in a multi speciality hospital_,
*New underwear at - Rs 75/-*

Second Opinion is Priceless…!!

Always take Second Opinion before going under the Surgery through Multi Speciality Hospital.

😁😁

:O