It was a great evening to ride fixed gear so I called up my FART buddies.
FART =
Fixed Alternative Riding Team. We formed about 5 or 6 or 7 or 8 years ago...not really sure. Team protocol is FIXED GEAR ONLY (no single speeds or multi gears allowed)...steel frames are preferred but not a requirement...if you ride a lugged steel frame, YOU AUTOMATICALLY ROCK! If you ride a lugged steel frame that you built...well, that's just FREAKING SEAN KELLY KOOL! I think we have about 5 or 6 or 7 or 8 dudes on the team...not really sure. We're all old guys in our 50's and 60's...but there's no age requirement. I'm the official FART Administration Officer because I have a really good laminator to laminate all the official FART cards (see pic below). We (FART) joined up with a pussyfoot multi gear group ride tonight...we (FARTers) like to bring knives to gunfights...AND DOMINATE!
Getting ready to go FARTing tonight with my trusty 2010 Schwinn Sprint fixed gear bike (Reynolds 853 track steel main tubes, track geometry but not a true track frame)...Dura-Ace 7700 Track BB/crank/chain ring...50/19T(69 GI)...and Dura-Ace 7700 Track HF hubs laced to Mavic Open Pro hoops...
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The official FART card on my Schwinn Sprint...held on by magnets...because steel is real, bitches! I'm in charge of laminating the official FART cards because I have a really good laminator...
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The official 'Patron Saints' of FART are on the reverse of the official FART card. The reason they are the 'Patron Saints' of FART is because they are track racers and therefore rode FIXED GEAR. Pictured below on the official FART card is my Uncle Bob (left) and my Dad aka 'The Dirty Racer' (right)...both were top amateur track racers in the mid to late 1920's in Newark, NJ (Bay View Wheelmen)...Uncle Bob went on to be a pro track racer. I believe the pic is from 1926 or 1927 and is located in the Newark Velodrome...
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The three FART members on the ride tonight...left to right: Jay (FART Co-Founder and Co-President), Pete (FART Co-Founder and Co-President) and Mad Dog (FART Administration Officer). NOTE: Jay built the steel frame/fork of his fixed gear bike himself (that's just FREAKING SEAN KELLY KOOL!) at frame building school...it is an unpainted lugged steel frame/fork and the dark grey finish that you see is the raw steel finish of the tubes...he keeps it from rusting by applying wax to the finish...
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Meeting up with the pussyfoot multi gear riders at the church...
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We (FART) brought our knives to the gunfight AND DOMINATED (as usual). The pussyfoot multi gear riders had to stop for ice cream near the end of the ride...can you believe that shit? Mad Dog is in the back of the group pic sporting the 'two thumbs up'...because he took the KOM tonight...which really isn't fair because he's the only active road racer (CAT 3) in the group...BUT Mad Dog doesn't care (like Honey Badger) because he, as well as the other FARTers, get really tired of hearing the pussyfoot multi gear riders saying crap like, "Hey you stupid FART guys, didn't anyone tell you that there's a BIG ASS HILL on the ride tonight? You've only got one gear...and you can't coast...you'll blow up on the climb...you'll spinout on the descent...you'll get dropped and we won't wait for you...you FART guys are sooooo stupid!" Blah, blah, blah...
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