- Posts
- 11
- Likes
- 85
Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread [No politics/religion]
- Posts
- 29,234
- Likes
- 75,571
Archer
··Omega Qualified Watchmaker
- Posts
- 3,859
- Likes
- 6,565
Vercingetorix
··Spam Risk
- Posts
- 8,001
- Likes
- 28,054
Tony C.
··Ωf Jury member
- Posts
- 8,742
- Likes
- 69,437
Darlinboy
··Pratts! Will I B******S!!!Chuck Norris was born in Ryan, Oklahoma. Looking for a way to honor their famous native son, the city Council came up with a proposal to name the main street in town "Chuck Norris Boulevard". That plan was quickly abandoned however, when they realized its folly.
.
.
.
No one can cross Chuck Norris and live.
.
.
.
No one can cross Chuck Norris and live.
- Posts
- 1,084
- Likes
- 6,494
- Posts
- 6,026
- Likes
- 20,723
pdxleaf
·
- Posts
- 8,001
- Likes
- 28,054
Tony C.
··Ωf Jury member
- Posts
- 234
- Likes
- 2,528
Donko1100
·A very tight-fisted family saved money on videotaping their wedding by remembering everything
- Posts
- 234
- Likes
- 2,528
Donko1100
·Chuck Norris once punched a man in the soul
- Posts
- 8,001
- Likes
- 28,054
Tony C.
··Ωf Jury member
- Posts
- 6,026
- Likes
- 20,723
pdxleaf
·"Has anyone noticed that all the instruments designed to discover intelligent life in the universe point away from The Earth?"
-G Bain. Comment in The Washington Post article on Webb Telescope.
-G Bain. Comment in The Washington Post article on Webb Telescope.
- Posts
- 3,328
- Likes
- 8,760
blufinz52
··Hears dead people, not watch rotors."Has anyone noticed that all the instruments designed to discover intelligent life in the universe point away from The Earth?"
-G Bain. Comment in The Washington Post article on Webb Telescope.
How would one find intelligent life in the universe without pointing the instruments towards the universe? 😉
- Posts
- 6,026
- Likes
- 20,723
pdxleaf
·It's in the title to the thread,
"Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread :-D"
"Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread :-D"
- Posts
- 3,328
- Likes
- 8,760
blufinz52
··Hears dead people, not watch rotors.I was joking...relax. 👍
- Posts
- 8,742
- Likes
- 69,437
Darlinboy
··Pratts! Will I B******S!!!“I just bought a top-of-the-line custom-fit hearing aid,” Tony excitedly related to his friend Sam. “It cost me a bloody fortune, but finally I can hear normally again!”
“That’s great! I’m really happy for for you my friend. What kind is it?” replied Sam.
“Twelve thirty-six,” said Tony glancing at his watch.
“That’s great! I’m really happy for for you my friend. What kind is it?” replied Sam.
“Twelve thirty-six,” said Tony glancing at his watch.
- Posts
- 1,084
- Likes
- 6,494
RI Omega Fan
·“I just bought a top-of-the-line custom-fit hearing aid,” Tony excitedly related to his friend Sam. “It cost me a bloody fortune, but finally I can hear normally again!”
“That’s great! I’m really happy for for you my friend. What kind is it?” replied Sam.
“Twelve thirty-six,” said Tony glancing at his watch.
- Posts
- 1,933
- Likes
- 8,475
Pun
·A 75 year Old Retired Military officer had one hobby.....
He loved to Fish.
He was sitting in his Boat the other Day when He heard a voice say, 'Pick Me Up.'
He looked around and couldn't see Anyone.
He thought He was Dreaming
When He heard the Voice say again,
''Pick me up. '
He looked in the Water and there....Floating on the top, was a Frog.
The Retd Officer said, 'Are You talking to Me?'
The Frog said, 'Yes, I'm talking to You. Pick Me up, then Kiss Me; and I'll turn into the Most Beautiful Woman you have ever seen. I'll make Sure that all Your friends will be envious and jealous, because I will be Your Bride!'
The Retired Offr looked at the Frog for a short time, reached over.....
Picked it up Carefully and......
Placed it in His Shirt Pocket.
The Frog said,
'What, are you Nuts? Didn't You hear what I Said?'
I said, 'Kiss me, And I will be Your Beautiful Bride.'
He opened His Pocket, Looked at the Frog and said,
'Nah. I'd Rather like have a Talking Frog
Than a Nagging Wife..
With Age Comes Wisdom & Experience.
He loved to Fish.
He was sitting in his Boat the other Day when He heard a voice say, 'Pick Me Up.'
He looked around and couldn't see Anyone.
He thought He was Dreaming
When He heard the Voice say again,
''Pick me up. '
He looked in the Water and there....Floating on the top, was a Frog.
The Retd Officer said, 'Are You talking to Me?'
The Frog said, 'Yes, I'm talking to You. Pick Me up, then Kiss Me; and I'll turn into the Most Beautiful Woman you have ever seen. I'll make Sure that all Your friends will be envious and jealous, because I will be Your Bride!'
The Retired Offr looked at the Frog for a short time, reached over.....
Picked it up Carefully and......
Placed it in His Shirt Pocket.
The Frog said,
'What, are you Nuts? Didn't You hear what I Said?'
I said, 'Kiss me, And I will be Your Beautiful Bride.'
He opened His Pocket, Looked at the Frog and said,
'Nah. I'd Rather like have a Talking Frog
Than a Nagging Wife..
With Age Comes Wisdom & Experience.
- Posts
- 536
- Likes
- 763
Alex_TA
·One guy found an old bottle, opened it and Jinn came out. "Ask what you want and I will make your wish come true." - "I want to enlarge my dick so that it reaches the ground" - "No problem" - said Jinn and bit off his legs.
- Posts
- 8,001
- Likes
- 28,054
Tony C.
··Ωf Jury member