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Canuck
·The sign said there was a fork in the road…..but it was a case of ‘fork off’
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This picture adds a new meaning to the word flatware! 😉
Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread [No politics/religion]
This picture adds a new meaning to the word flatware! 😉
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M'Bob
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Tony C.
··Ωf Jury member
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M'Bob
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Wryfox
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Wryfox
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Wryfox
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Tony C.
··Ωf Jury member
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Raaanch
·What's blue but taste like red paint?
Blue paint.
Blue paint.
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Omegafanman
·
And the joke of the month award goes to…..
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Wryfox
·Dear Mum & Dad,
I am very well, I hope you are too. Tell big brothers Sean, Tommy and Mick that the Army is better than working on the farm.
I was a bit slow settling down at first because you don't get out of bed until 6am, but I got used to it and I like sleeping in now. All you do before breakfast is make your bed, shine your boots a quick shit and clean your uniform. No cows to milk, no calves to feed, no feed to stack, nothing. Men must shave, but it’s not too bad because there's hot water and a light to see what you’re doing. For breakfast there’s cereal, fruit and eggs but there's no fillet steaks or sausages. You don't get fed again until noon, and by that time all the city boys are buggered because we've been on a 'route march', which is just like walking to the well in the meadow.
This will kill Sean and Tommy with laughter but I keep getting medals for shooting!! I don’t know why because the bull’s-eye is as big as a bloody bull's head and it doesn't move and it’s not firing back at you like the Murphy’s did when our bull got their cow in calf before the prize show. All you have to do is make yourself comfortable and hit the target - piece of piss. You don't even load your own cartridges - they come in boxes and you don't have to steady yourself against the roll bar of the tractor when you reload. Sometimes we wrestle with the city boys and I have to be very careful because they break easy - it's not like fighting with Sean, Tommy, Mick and all the other local fellas all at once like we do.
Turns out I'm not a bad boxer either; it looks like I'm the best the platoon's got. I've only been beaten once by this guy from Scotland - he's 6 foot 8 and 120 kilos so he’s a good bit bigger than me but I fought to the end.
I can't complain about the Army - tell the boys to get in quick before word gets out how good it is.
Your loving daughter,
Susan...
I am very well, I hope you are too. Tell big brothers Sean, Tommy and Mick that the Army is better than working on the farm.
I was a bit slow settling down at first because you don't get out of bed until 6am, but I got used to it and I like sleeping in now. All you do before breakfast is make your bed, shine your boots a quick shit and clean your uniform. No cows to milk, no calves to feed, no feed to stack, nothing. Men must shave, but it’s not too bad because there's hot water and a light to see what you’re doing. For breakfast there’s cereal, fruit and eggs but there's no fillet steaks or sausages. You don't get fed again until noon, and by that time all the city boys are buggered because we've been on a 'route march', which is just like walking to the well in the meadow.
This will kill Sean and Tommy with laughter but I keep getting medals for shooting!! I don’t know why because the bull’s-eye is as big as a bloody bull's head and it doesn't move and it’s not firing back at you like the Murphy’s did when our bull got their cow in calf before the prize show. All you have to do is make yourself comfortable and hit the target - piece of piss. You don't even load your own cartridges - they come in boxes and you don't have to steady yourself against the roll bar of the tractor when you reload. Sometimes we wrestle with the city boys and I have to be very careful because they break easy - it's not like fighting with Sean, Tommy, Mick and all the other local fellas all at once like we do.
Turns out I'm not a bad boxer either; it looks like I'm the best the platoon's got. I've only been beaten once by this guy from Scotland - he's 6 foot 8 and 120 kilos so he’s a good bit bigger than me but I fought to the end.
I can't complain about the Army - tell the boys to get in quick before word gets out how good it is.
Your loving daughter,
Susan...
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Wryfox
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ConElPueblo
·Could we please stop spreading tinfoil hat memes unjustly undermining authorities and science?
I know this is a joke thread, but this is not funny, it is insulting.
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Tony C.
··Ωf Jury memberCould we please stop spreading tinfoil hat memes unjustly undermining authorities and science?
You don't believe that the corruption of scientific research is a real, and serious issue? You don't believe that some well-credentialed scientists and doctors whose views were at odds with the mainstream narratives were, at least at times, essentially blackballed from popular media outlets?
There is plenty of available evidence for both, which makes them anything but "tinfoil hat memes". As to the obvious exaggeration in the referenced joke, well, that's how humor often works, and no one would take the numbers literally.