Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread :-D

Posts
14,299
Likes
41,174
Took me a sec...Sunny and Share. Well done!

Actually, Sonny and CHER. Well done!
 
Posts
3,466
Likes
7,964
Geez.... don't yell at me Bob, but are these jokes or riddles?

If Lassie screwed a cantaloupe, what would you have?


A melon-collie baby!
 
Posts
3,466
Likes
7,964
What do blondes and tornado's have in common?

They always end up in trailer courts!
 
Posts
14,299
Likes
41,174
Geez.... don't yell at me Bob, but are these jokes or riddles?

If Lassie screwed a cantaloupe, what would you have?


A melon-collie baby!

I have read that Lassie was a girl!
 
Posts
3,466
Likes
7,964
I have read that Lassie was a girl!
We gotta talk about the Lassie/Laddie and screwin' thing, brother.
 
Posts
6,707
Likes
21,635
Geez.... don't yell at me Bob, but are these jokes or riddles?

Technically, you could argue they are not, but as puns, or a play on words, they could be loosely classified under the riddle umbrella.

The problem is, as you noted yourself, that the jokes here are starting to get repeat tellings, because after a while, many of the available jokes have been used. So I thought I'd mix it up a tad with a little combo pun/puzzle. Had no idea the comedy police would be banging at my front door...
 
Posts
16,372
Likes
34,510
T............ Had no idea the comedy police would be banging at my front door...

Yeah! Them bastards!

 
Posts
6,707
Likes
21,635
Damn you! Couldn't get that one. Was thinking: what the hell comedy team is wreath and venom?
 
Posts
6,707
Likes
21,635
For the comedy traditionalists:

Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.

The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra.

After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin.

Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course, Ibepokin.

Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed byPepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer..

It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one.

Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of 'cocktails’,'highballs' and just a good old-fashioned 'stiff drink'.

Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO.

Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on
breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research.

This means that by 2025, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them
 
Posts
27,640
Likes
70,264
Technically, you could argue they are not, but as puns, or a play on words, they could be loosely classified under the riddle umbrella.

The problem is, as you noted yourself, that the jokes here are starting to get repeat tellings, because after a while, many of the available jokes have been used. So I thought I'd mix it up a tad with a little combo pun/puzzle. Had no idea the comedy police would be banging at my front door...

Well, the title of the thread is "Tell me a joke" not "Riddle me this" and these posts are clearly not jokes.

Maybe you should start a new thread as a way of satisfying everyone...the Riddler and the "comedy traditionalists"...
 
Posts
1,006
Likes
1,708
The riddles are amusing, but I can't exactly re-tell and pass them off as my own at the pub or in my WhatsApp groups.
 
Posts
27,640
Likes
70,264
"When I was a kid, I once shop-lifted a thesaurus. But then I felt so guilty, so sorry, so remorseful, so shameful, so repentant—so I returned it."
 
Posts
6,707
Likes
21,635
Maybe you should start a new thread as a way of satisfying everyone...

Now, that's funny..
 
Posts
27,640
Likes
70,264
Now, that's funny..

Good - glad I could add something funny to a thread recently filled with riddles. 😉