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Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread :-D

  1. Pun Apr 25, 2024

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    A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.

    On their wedding night, she told her new husband,

    “Please be gentle, I’m still a virgin.”

    “What?” said the puzzled groom.

    “How can that be if you’ve been married ten times?”

    “Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

    Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he’d look into it and get back to me.

    Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn’t get the system up.

    Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn’t know when he would be able to deliver.

    Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

    Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn’t sure whether it was his job or not.

    Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.

    Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.

    Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.

    Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was… God! I miss him! But now that I’ve married you, I’m really excited!”

    “Good,” said the new husband, “but, why?”

    “You’re a lawyer. This time I know I’m gonna get screwed!”
     
    kkt, Twocats, Darlinboy and 11 others like this.
  2. M'Bob Apr 25, 2024

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    Excellent. I’m wondering if I could possibly re-tell it…
     
    blufinz52 and Pun like this.
  3. Tony C. Ωf Jury member Apr 25, 2024

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  4. Barking mad Prolific Speedmaster Hoarder Apr 25, 2024

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    For those that lived a little more dangerously
    IMG_9206.jpeg
     
  5. impalla62ss Apr 25, 2024

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  6. M'Bob Apr 26, 2024

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  7. Wryfox Apr 26, 2024

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    Jones in LA, Darlinboy, ghce and 7 others like this.
  8. Wryfox Apr 26, 2024

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    Jones in LA, kkt, Paedipod and 4 others like this.
  9. Archer Omega Qualified Watchmaker Apr 26, 2024

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    kkt, Scarecrow Boat, bubba48 and 2 others like this.
  10. Omegafanman Apr 26, 2024

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  11. Wryfox Apr 26, 2024

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    Jones in LA, kkt, DaveK and 1 other person like this.
  12. Archer Omega Qualified Watchmaker Apr 26, 2024

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    kkt, Scarecrow Boat, bubba48 and 2 others like this.
  13. Wryfox Apr 26, 2024

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    Jones in LA, kkt, pdxleaf and 9 others like this.
  14. redpcar Apr 26, 2024

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    upload_2024-4-26_20-15-19.png
     
    Jones in LA, CPRwatch, Syzygy and 6 others like this.
  15. hmmmcamu Apr 27, 2024

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    Pssst .............
     
    s-l1600.jpg
  16. DaveK Yoda of Yodelers Apr 27, 2024

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    I guess that Scrotum Coffee Roasters was already taken :thumbsdown:

    IMG_8565.jpeg
     
  17. Pvt-Public Apr 27, 2024

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    Jones in LA, CPRwatch, DaveK and 3 others like this.
  18. BlackTalon This Space for Rent Apr 27, 2024

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    Timely info, as I'm supposed to go to the outer banks in a couple months...
     
  19. Pvt-Public Apr 27, 2024

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    And it is a real place
     
    BlackTalon likes this.
  20. arturo7 Apr 27, 2024

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    DaveK likes this.