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Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread :-D

  1. impalla62ss Nov 16, 2022

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  2. Tony C. Ωf Jury member Nov 16, 2022

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    The joke, of course, is the newspaper.


    cshw65.png
     
  3. Darlinboy Pratts! Will I B******S!!! Nov 16, 2022

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    News broke today that Elon Musk is now firing Twitter employees with bad posture.


    [​IMG]
    "I have a hunch I will be next," confirmed a long-time employee.
     
  4. M'Bob Nov 17, 2022

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  5. Wryfox Nov 17, 2022

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  6. Wryfox Nov 17, 2022

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    Duracuir1 and Omegafanman like this.
  7. Wryfox Nov 17, 2022

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  8. STANDY schizophrenic pizza orderer and watch collector Nov 17, 2022

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    A woman walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter systematically pasting ‘Love’ stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them.

    He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. The woman’s curiosity gets the better of her and she walks up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing.

    The man says: “I’m sending out one thousand Valentine’s Day cards signed, ‘Guess who?'”

    “But why?” asks the woman. The man replies: “I’m a divorce lawyer.”
     
  9. STANDY schizophrenic pizza orderer and watch collector Nov 17, 2022

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    I always throw a punch first up when I go to see a psychic.
    If they duck they are good to go.
     
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  10. Ascalon Nov 17, 2022

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    My buttock masseuse, a fine man, leaves no stern untoned.
     
  11. Duracuir1 Never Used A Kodak Nov 17, 2022

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  12. DaveK Yoda of Yodelers Nov 17, 2022

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  13. Canuck Nov 17, 2022

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    Or a short horn toot!
     
  14. Wryfox Nov 17, 2022

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  15. MyVintageOmega Nov 18, 2022

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    Walking home from the New Irish Pub in Town.
     
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  16. M'Bob Nov 18, 2022

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  17. time flies Nov 18, 2022

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    For my entertainment industry friends who have seen it all too often, and my non industry friends...an oldie but a goodie. It's rare to see it in colour.
    Screenshot_20221118-162125_Chrome.jpg

    have fun
    kfw
     
    SpeedyPhill, Kiltie, Paedipod and 6 others like this.
  18. impalla62ss Nov 18, 2022

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  19. Mouse_at_Large still immune to Speedmaster attraction Nov 18, 2022

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    Sulkypetal, flw and Omegafanman like this.
  20. M'Bob Nov 18, 2022

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    A blonde walks into a police station looking for a job.

    The interviewing officer says, “What’s two plus two?” “Four,” she replies.

    “Great; now, what’s the square root of 100?” “10,” she says.

    “Excellent. Finally, can you tell me who killed Abraham Lincoln?” “I dunno,” was her response. He says, “Go home and think about it, and come back tomorrow.”

    Her best friend calls her to see how it went. The blonde says, “Great, I got the job. Not only that, they already have me working on a murder case…”