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Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread :-D

  1. Omegafanman Jun 16, 2022

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    This reminds me of the short lived …’speeding saves lives’ campaign in the UK :0)
    .
     
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  2. Tony C. Ωf Jury member Jun 16, 2022

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  3. Wryfox Jun 16, 2022

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  4. Wryfox Jun 16, 2022

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  5. Tony C. Ωf Jury member Jun 16, 2022

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    "Tik-Tok Investors"


    tti87.png
     
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  6. pdxleaf Often mistaken for AI... Jun 16, 2022

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    Okay, we're going there?

    What's the difference between Trump and Zelensky?
    Zelensky defends his capital.
     
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  7. Wryfox Jun 16, 2022

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  8. Duracuir1 Never Used A Kodak Jun 17, 2022

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  9. Watch my Whisky Jun 17, 2022

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    A guy tried to sell me a coffin.

    I told him that’s the last thing I need.
     
  10. Wryfox Jun 17, 2022

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  11. M'Bob Jun 17, 2022

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    Stewardess! Can I change my seat please?

    5D0CEF72-0EBF-4C87-A9EE-B0183C2C55BE.jpeg
     
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  12. Tony C. Ωf Jury member Jun 17, 2022

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    There's such a rich vein of comedy gold to be found in the financial space these days, that I can't resist continuing posting various nuggets. :D


    soft645.png
     
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  13. Darlinboy Pratts! Will I B******S!!! Jun 17, 2022

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    "What's the matter?" Sam asked his friend Tony as they sat nursing drinks at the local bar, "You seem really down today!"

    "Yeah, well you would be too!" replied Tony as he finished his drink and motioned for another round.

    "My new girlfriend just told me I'm awful in the sack!" he whined. "And it's just so unfair! How can she possibly come to that conclusion in less than a minute?!"
     
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  14. Cenzo Jun 17, 2022

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    Guy walks into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He puts the alligator up on the bar. He turns to the astonished patrons.

    "I'll make you a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. Then the gator will then close his mouth for one minute. He'll then open his mouth, and I'll remove myself unscathed. In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink."

    The crowd murmured their approval. The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers, and placed his privates in the alligator's open mouth. The gator closed his mouth as the crowd gasped. After a minute, the man grabbed a beer bottle and rapped the alligator hard on the top of its head. The gator opened his mouth and the man removed his genitals - unscathed as promised.

    The crowd cheered and the first of his free drinks was delivered.

    The man stood up again and made another offer. "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try".

    A hush fell over the crowd. After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar.

    A woman timidly spoke up.

    "I'll try, but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle"
     
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  15. lindo Jun 17, 2022

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  16. STANDY schizophrenic pizza orderer and watch collector Jun 17, 2022

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    Boy aged 4: Dad, I’ve decided to get married.

    Dad: Wonderful; do you have a girl in mind?

    Boy: Yes… grandma! She said she loves me, I love her, too… and she’s the best cook and story teller in the whole world!

    Dad: That’s nice, but we have a small problem there!

    Boy: What problem?!

    Dad: She happens to be my mother. How can you marry my mother!

    Boy: Why not?! You married mine!
     
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  17. JimInOz Melbourne Australia Jun 18, 2022

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    On that theme (child logic).

    Screen Shot 2022-06-18 at 15.32.58.png
     
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  18. pdxleaf Often mistaken for AI... Jun 18, 2022

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  19. M'Bob Jun 18, 2022

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    Who says decorum is dead?

    E80977CD-D1A9-4247-A604-20278DA74922.jpeg
     
  20. Wryfox Jun 18, 2022

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