My desk at the moment ...

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Pretty much sums up the year.

Watchmaking and obsolete camera collecting is expensive.

For the first time, in like a decade, I owe taxes. (did I really spend that much on eBay and shopGoodwill?)

rusty parts lots are no bargain.



Not sure why I am so frustrated, grumpy and tired. Or even sharing this with a bunch of strangers?

I got it better than 99.99999 percent of the people on this planet. -- Just no cash flow. (but I grow a modicum of my own food (peppers, squash, tomatoes, occasional popcorn, and there are fruit trees. not to mention the grapes and figs.) I look out the windows over the Napa and Sonoma valleys, The best weather the planet has to offer. ... And I can cook! Having worked as a security guard in Yontville before the pandemic, I guarded 5 star kitchens. So I know my home cooked meals are just as good. And people are always gifting us wine. (Before prohibition this was where the Christian brothers had their vineyards.)

Eventually though, all this goes away.

Curious, though. My grandparents died of stroke in their early 70s. I just turned 65. Now we have blood pressure meds what can potentially let us live into our 90s. like my parents, who have me to care for them. Which has become almost a 24/7 job. My dad had three falls last year, and has been confined mostly to the upstairs as he can only walk a few feet with assistance. But we were able to put in a stairlift for him. It is just that he can harldy be left alone for more than 15 minuts. So it is mostly my mom, who is almost 90, and myself to take turns. So I do not have my 50 to 60 hours uninterrupted a week for working on my projects. Which are enough for 500 years. And cover the last 3000 years of history. I said I had it better than most kings.

Not sure what scares me more? Going quick (and not by choice,) or living another 20 or 30 years. Many of my friends are gone, partly because I liked hanging out with older people.

My classmates always seemed so dumb, and could only talk about or copy TV programs. No real creativity. I think this is why everything is a remake or sequel. Sometimes I think I come from the most selfish generation ever. Strange, how we had the moon an tossed it out in the trash. So we could repeat the mistakes that were never learned. Funny thing I was brought up to be a globalist socialist liberal hippy, who thinks anyone should be able to live, work and visit anywhere in this solar system, galaxy or universe. (light bubble?) So what happened? Why must we bully others and tell them what they can and can not have? What is so important about retaining cultural identity?

I actually love the 21st century (and the bleed into the late 20th) where else can one spend the weekends in the 16th or 19th century. Now I am getting the feeling that the 13th seems to be when people were the happiest. So many want to return to that era, before globalization. Tribal family groups, locally grown food. And the plauge was no for another century (the 14th) and it only lasted 4 years (killing something like 2/3rds the population)

Not sure why people in the 21st want to maintain 20th century values and Ideas? On the other hand flying cars are not what they used to be. Not to mention people in the 13th century barely had ships. And some claimed America had no wheels (or carts.) (But TV shows makes you think the Aztecs and Incas had anti gravity for moving goods about the lost cities.) More interesting is that Arabia had equal rights for women. So many get the 12th, 13th, and 14th centuries mixed up. They are not the same. And the values are as valid and DEI and wanting to say some pigs are more equal than other pigs to quote Orwell. But in math classes I learned apples are the same as oranges. So everyone gets a gold star and a trophy.


So why do we still need passports? and tariffs. Tolls(taxes) are of course necessary for the upkeep of roads, the same as remuneration for ones time But to restrict when and where and to whom wages or barter can be paid. seems more like indentured servitude. Everything seems now to be extortion and graft. Which is something I thought Spartacus did away with in the first century BCE. To bad Gaius Julius Caesar sixth of his name and his dozens of kids and grand kids, known by their nicknames (Agustus, Caligula, Nero) found a way to kill god and create the world we live in.

Is Musk the next Sejanus?

Why should people own ideas and art (designs?) which are ephemeral. I guess though I am selfish here too. My opinions are mine and mine alone, so you can not have them.


... and I remain addicted to eBay.
 
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You can't fret too much about your own longevity, there is only so much you can do because your genes can't be changed (at least not yet). My dad died at age 50, but I've blown past that by almost a quarter century and my health is excellent. We have far better medicines and medical care for sure in the last 50-60 years even though people carp about the cost. An argument for another day, but I'll take today's medical treatment vs what was around for my dad in the early 1960's. My brother died at 80, my sister is still kicking at 77, so I just keep going. Bought a new motorcycle last month, I'm not going to go easily, but when it's time, it's time.
 
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Yeah I agree. Since I was making the point my grandparents did not have the better medical care. Although my grandmother's youngest sister is still alive at 106/107.

Monday would have been my brother's 63rd birthday. He died a few weeks before his 5th birthday 58 years ago. So I have dealt with this all my life.

Dad has a sister who is 100. She is not in much better shape that my dad, although she is in assisted living. Her daughter, my cousin died at 58.
So there was expectation that the daughter would be around to care for her. Mom's aunt outlived some of her children.


Funny thing is I remember my brother dying after his birthday. A second brother died a month or so later (accidental death.) So I kinda came unstuck in time. For years I could not tell time, as I missed that lecture in school. Was not until clocks went digital that I could tell time in a way.

This may not be exactly correct. I could not translate the positions of the clock hands to a number beyond an hour. I could however divide the hours into quarters and thirds depending on the position of the minute hand. What I really did not like was being interrrupted in what ever project I was working on.

Watches and clocks fascinated me even then (especially the digital ones of the 1970s) It was not though until I was on my own finding clocks in antique stores that I became impassioned. I had been mesmerized and terrified by mechanical dolls.

I also remember what I got for my 7th birthday. A model saturn 5 rocket that was as tall as I was. I was really into snoopy and the moon landing. I think it was my anodyne. I probably would have been just as happy with a snoopy plush in a spacesuit. (one of my myiad of projects.) Which I think was what I really wanted. But I was mad over anything space related. (My brother was into trains, I do not recall him having much interest in the space program. He was really sick that last year which is when a lot was happening in the world.) I was also into disney animation and that is when I tried making my own animated cartoons, since the camera could be wound up to take a single frame.

By chance, it is possible my speedmaster was made on my 10th birthday in 1970. Too bad I did not get it then. I got it when I started working at Apple. I still wonder what happened with the engraved back with the initials of a prior owner. (WCL) which is also on the bracelet. It came with both backs.

Anyway a new toy arrived this afternoon. Yet another film scanner. This one has a broken screen. I use similar screens on the pipe organ projects.


Years ago I started to build my own scanner. So this is a project I have had for 50 or more years. But it has become more about the hardware and scanning algorithims than the content.

Curious how cameras and projectors are related to clockwork, as before electronics they used a mechanical escapement to precicely record time and were powered with springs.