I'm accepting name suggestions for a show that does not exist. Let's just call the pilot Bezel Brothers.

Bezel Brothers follows two heavily bearded Brooklynite brothers and vintage watch aficionados as they drive door-to-door across America, intruding on the homes of long-retired, octogenarian Rolex and Omega repair specialists tracked down from a stack of "vintage" phone books (that double as sleeping bag mattresses) stored in the back of their show-branded van.

If you've seen American Pickers then you know the template. After a knock on the door and some super tense moments of confusion and mistrust they are invited in for a coffee, to be regaled with stories from the glory days of watch repair past. They nod dutifully and pretend to care.

If all goes well (and it almost always goes well), they are invited in to rummage mercilessly and unsupervised through rows of dusty, long-ago boxed up bins overflowing with decades worth of discarded bezels, dials, hands, pushers and other horological miscellany carted home from their once bustling workshops and showrooms.

After 4 hours of digging through stacks of incredibly pedestrian Constellation pie-pans, SCORE!!! The hosts salivate in a cautious huddle over a 2998-1 dial which looks almost NOS...and in the bin next to it, a sun-kissed DO90.

Lacking the gall necessary to actually wink at the camera, the brothers – looking earnest – and to the irrepressible delight of a thoroughly stunned retiree, peel 1700 dollars off a large roll and place it on the table in front of him. Unable to see the large on-screen graphics that lay out in perfect detail the shrewd cunning of this proposal, he gladly accepts.

Now a handshake paired with some cash register sound effects and traveling music certify everyone is happy, and they will remain happy, well...until this episode airs and true market values are revealed. But by then our protagonists will be somewhere west of Tucson filming season 2.

 

I would watch it in a heartbeat!

 

Wouldn't "vultures" be a better word than "protagonists"?

Everybody likes a bargain but to make entertainment of the exploitation of honest people is sick (and I don't mean that in the street-speak meaning of the word) Far better for them to discuss the true value with the retired chap and offer to sell it for him on a commission basis. It would be far better for the presenters to look like decent people than low-life scum, preying on the elderly.

Fortunately, the concept would have so little market appeal that it would never sell.

 

Nice pitch.
Don't forget to include in the concept a fetching, tattooed sister who runs a small retail store selling their wonderful finds and T-shirts!
Also, every few episodes they should come across a dial they are uncertain about. At this point, they take a picture and send it to the "experts" at Hodinkee, who render an opinion and ultimately buy the dial and feature it on the shop as a Bearded Brother special.

 

The show would have a Neilson rating of .002% and get cancelled midway through the second episode, with more interesting coverage of the Swedish Amateur Curling League preempting the purchase of a half dozen date star drive wheels for a caliber 381.

 

Have to be Sci Fi if you think the above is real....


How about they just go looking for the missing Speedmaster that was dropped on the moon by a astronaut during the first moon landing.........

 

"TIME BANDITS"

 

I absolutely didn't forget her, I just needed to get on with the day. But she's in the mix, and doing something,...probably manning the retail counter as you suggest.

I know she is "FED UP" with their non-stop research requests, ...and that she rolls her eyes for the camera every time the UPS guy carts in another stack of vintage phone books that the brothers picked up on eBay. Good times.

 

I know what show I would choose...

 

Ok, premise good, but you lost me at heavily bearded and Brooklyn. I would rather watch a group of Atlanta housewives scratch their nails on chalkboards (slightly less annoying).

 

So is my dad and my uncle, my grandparents and my great grandparents. please don't take it personally.

 

You might be waiting a long time to see Christina Bertrup on amateur league coverage, as she's a pro curler

 

Who cares? She's hot! So are some of the Canadian professional curlers.

 

Yep...



And even without hot chicks, it's a great game to watch!

 

And I give you Eve Muirhead

 

This is the kind of cultural and sporting discourse that needs to be seen here more often.
The ladies, the watches, the great outdoors. These are a few of my favorite things.

 

Just looking out for the best interests for fellow forumites. I keep picturing a poor soul, watching hours and hours of the wrong coverage, and wondering, "where's Christina?!?! WHERE'S CHRISTINA?!?!?!"

And, Ron Burgundy's into curling.

 

Certainly no hog line violation there!

 

This thread.