A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day there he takes off his clothes and starts to wander around. A gorgeous petite blonde walks by, and the man immediately gets an erection. The woman notices his erection, comes over to him and says, "Did you call for me?" The man replies, "No, what do you mean?" She says, "You must be new here. Let me explain. It's a rule here that if you get an erection, it implies you called for me." Smiling, she leads him to the side of the swimming pool. She lies down on a towel, eagerly pulls him to her and happily lets him have his way with her. Later, the man continues to explore the colony's facilities. He enters the sauna and as he sits down, he farts. Within minutes a huge, hairy man lumbers out of the room toward him, "Did you call for me?" asks the hairy man. "No, what do you mean?" says the newcomer. "You must be new," says the hairy man, "it's a rule that if you fart, it implies that you called for me." The huge man then easily spins him around, bends him over a bench and buggers him senseless! The newcomer then staggers back to the colony office, where he is greeted by the smiling, naked receptionist, "May I help you?" she says. The man yells, "Here's my membership card. You can have the key back and you can keep the £500 membership fee." "But, Sir," she says, "you've only been here for a few hours! You haven't had the chance to see all our facilities!" The man replies, "Listen lady, I'm 68 years old. I get an erection once a month. And I fart 15 times a day............................... I'm outta here!"