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Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread [No politics/religion]

Mouse_at_Large
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Interviewer: How do you explain this 4 year gap on your resume?
Me: That's when I went to Yale.
Interviewer: That's pretty impressive. You're hired.
Me: Thank you, I really need this Yob.

I can't believe I was arrested for impersonating a politician!
I was just sitting there doing nothing.......

What did Master Yoda say when he first saw himself in 4k?
HDMI

::rimshot::
 
Wivac
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My partner asked if they were the only one I'd ever been with.

I said yes.

The others were all nines and tens.
 
Canuck
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Wivac Wivac
My partner asked if they were the only one I'd ever been with.

I said yes.

The others were all nines and tens.

I, for one, will need to mull that one around a bit. Aha! I just got it. You rated your partner as a ONE, while all the others were NINES and TENS.
 
JimInOz
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My wife apologised for the first time ever today.

She said she's sorry she ever married me.
 
Wryfox
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Wivac Wivac
My partner asked if they were the only one I'd ever been with.

I said yes.

The others were all nines and tens.

That one snuck up on me...😲
 
MyVintageOmega
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*** A woman has the last word in any argument.
*** Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

*** A Man lives longer if he get's get Married.
*** He's also willing to die sooner.
Edited:
 
M'Bob
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For you history buffs: can anyone name this famous duo?

image.gif image.jpeg
 
M'Bob
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MyVintageOmega MyVintageOmega
Porky Pig (Looney Tunes) and Margaret Gorman (1921 Miss America)
Both were 1st's

You are warm, and that's a great guess. I'll give a hint: when you get the correct Miss America, it will become obvious...
 
Canuck
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Miss America 1935, Henrietta Leaver? This was the year of the first Porky Pig cartoon. Bess Myerson, Miss America 1945?
 
M'Bob
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Canuck Canuck
Miss America 1935, Henrietta Leaver? This was the year of the first Porky Pig cartoon. Bess Myerson, Miss America 1945?

You've got it. So the famous duo is...?
 
GeorgeBailey2
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Canuck Canuck
Miss America 1935, Henrietta Leaver? This was the year of the first Porky Pig cartoon. Bess Myerson, Miss America 1945?
Think Broadway.
 
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