Community Stories

Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread [No politics/religion]

lindo
Posts
894
Likes
4,148
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new
dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by
saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend
said, 'Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?'
'HELLLOOOOOOO. . .. ,' answered the blonde. 'They're watch dogs.'
 
rob#1
Posts
2,008
Likes
3,386
Charlemagne1333 Charlemagne1333
The Flat Earth Society has members all around the globe...

What’s funnier is that this was actually tweeted by the Flat Earth Society 😜

BD716643-0B16-442A-A780-F5A2284C81FC.png
 
Darlinboy
Posts
8,742
Likes
69,436
“I’ve just been back to the office for the first time in months,” said Fred. “And right away I’ve learned Covid isn’t the worst thing you can get.”

“I dunno Fred, what did you get that’s worse?” asked Ned.

“The axe!” moaned Fred.
 
P
Posts
2,326
Likes
7,545
whitewolf777 whitewolf777
Lady: “Mr Bond I like your watch”
Bond: “With this watch I can see that you are not wearing underwear”
Lady: “But I AM wearing underwear”
Bond: “This watch is one hour early”

actually used this in real life. 😀
 
Archer
Posts
29,118
Likes
75,255
2020 24.jpg


"I wanna be sedated" - theme song for 2020...
 
kkt
Posts
1,698
Likes
1,653
whitewolf777 whitewolf777
😀👍 I would have loved to be around when you did, to witness the lady’s reaction.

Well, he's still alive, so that's a start.
 
Darlinboy
Posts
8,742
Likes
69,436
She: don't worry, the pandemic will be over in a few months!

He: who told you that?

She: yes.
 
Darlinboy
Posts
8,742
Likes
69,436
I stared as she stepped from the shower and stood there naked and glistening before me. My heart fluttered, I felt a connection, something deep, something magical, I was transported to another place and I thought to myself...






- good lord these binoculars are fantastic!
 
lindo
Posts
894
Likes
4,148
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She
rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was,
'If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?'

She thought for a time and then asked, 'Is it on or off?’
 
STANDY
Posts
16,853
Likes
47,844
I named my dog 6 miles so I can tell people that I walk 6 miles every single day
 
Archer
Posts
29,118
Likes
75,255
The Thing - a movie about a group of people stuck together in a snowbound location, trying to figure out who has a terrifying infection, is the Christmas movie of 2020.
 
9602 More Posts...
Sign up or log in to reply...

Similar threads

vbrad26

The Commercial - and now general space travel - Thread (No Politics Allowed)

vbrad26 Open Discussion
vbrad26
vbrad26
Posts
349
Views
29K