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Tell me a joke! The OF humor thread :-D

  1. Archer Ω 2

    Archer Omega Qualified Watchmaker Nov 30, 2020

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    flw, ZIELSZIEK, SpeedyPhill and 7 others like this.
  2. M'Bob Ω 2

    M'Bob Nov 30, 2020

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    Omegafanman likes this.
  3. jshopper1

    jshopper1 Nov 30, 2020

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  4. Edward53

    Edward53 Dec 1, 2020

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    A man with a dog comes onto the stage in a variety show.
    - Ladies and Gentlemen, I present Marvo, the incredible talking dog! Yes Ladies and Gentlemen, I shall ask the amazing Marvo a series of questions and he will give me the correct answers in English!
    The act starts:
    - Now Marvo, name the type of lace collar that Elizabethans used to wear.
    - Ruff!
    - What do we call the pointed structure on top of a house?
    - Roof!
    - Who is a British goalkeeper who has won over 50 international caps?
    - Rough!
    There are cries of "Rubbish!" and "Get off!" They are pelted with missiles and have to leave the stage.
    In the taxi on the way home, Marvo and his owner are very silent and dejected. Then Marvo says, "Do you think I should have said Peter Shilton for that last one?"
     
    VjaceCZ, Fretworker, Mad Cow and 6 others like this.
  5. Pvt-Public

    Pvt-Public Dec 1, 2020

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    Replying to a post with only the original post and not adding anything ::facepalm2::::stirthepot::::bleh::
     
  6. jshopper1

    jshopper1 Dec 1, 2020

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    Sorry about that. Didn’t intend to post anything. No idea how it happened. Must have touched the wrong button.

    Mods please remove.
     
  7. Vercingetorix Ω 2

    Vercingetorix Spam Risk Dec 1, 2020

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    JohnWoo, CdnWatchDoc and Omegafanman like this.
  8. RonJ

    RonJ Dec 1, 2020

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    That scarf has a snug fit to it.

    knit-a-scarf.jpg
     
    blufinz52, JohnWoo, Omegafanman and 4 others like this.
  9. Vercingetorix Ω 2

    Vercingetorix Spam Risk Dec 1, 2020

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    Omegafanman, RI Omega Fan, bubba48 and 1 other person like this.
  10. Pvt-Public

    Pvt-Public Dec 1, 2020

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    No worries at all, just a little friendly ribbing. :p:thumbsup:
     
    Omegafanman likes this.
  11. Charlemagne1333

    Charlemagne1333 Dec 1, 2020

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    You know what they say about cliffhangers...
     
    DaveK likes this.
  12. vitriol

    vitriol Dec 2, 2020

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  13. Archer Ω 2

    Archer Omega Qualified Watchmaker Dec 2, 2020

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    YYTIN, mr.snakeman, CdnWatchDoc and 18 others like this.
  14. RI Omega Fan Ω 1

    RI Omega Fan Dec 3, 2020

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  15. Mad Cow

    Mad Cow Dec 4, 2020

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    WHO comes with some new COVID-19 virus advice...



    "I wouldn't touch it with a six foot pole!" declares top scientist.
     
    Edited Dec 4, 2020
    Darlinboy likes this.
  16. Pun

    Pun Dec 4, 2020

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    Just advertising
     
    85BF09B9-9551-4AEC-94BE-B48F19F6A4C7.jpeg
    blufinz52, YYTIN, schoolboy and 7 others like this.
  17. MikiJ

    MikiJ Likes songs about Purple spices Dec 4, 2020

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    Too funny as I just saw this across the street and was going to post it myself. It's a good one!
     
    Pun likes this.
  18. Wivac

    Wivac Terribly special Dec 4, 2020

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    Q: Why do you never see Hippos hiding in trees?





























    A: Because they're very good at it.
     
    MaiLollo, Mouse_at_Large, DaveK and 2 others like this.
  19. Pun

    Pun Dec 4, 2020

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    Let's have coffee there someday...
     
  20. Omegafanman

    Omegafanman Dec 5, 2020

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    I resemble this remark...……..
     
    Joke.jpg
    flw, schoolboy, JohnWoo and 3 others like this.